Adoption becoming more open for moms
November is National Adoption Awareness month and the process of adoption has evolved across the years.
With mothers becoming more involved in the process of adoption they are able to choose a family and can even communicate with their offspring.
LDS Family Services is a local organization that helps in the placement of
children in two parent homes.
The agency is the largest non-profit organization for adoption and
reduces the cost of adoption for all involved.
All candidates are infertile and often await the child for months or even
years. One reason many people are going abroad for adoption is that the demand for children exceeds the number of children waiting for an adoption.
“The adoptive families are better prepared for parental care. The struggle
for fertility, and wait for the child allow for the couple to develop and grow
preparing them for parenthood,” stated Rick Hill the Director of the National
Adoption Agency.
As adoptions become more open the birth mother is able to choose the home
that the child will be placed in. The parents hoping to adopt the child are
all posted on a website called www.itsaboutlove.com.
“When a she finds out she’s pregnant. She is bombarded by advise from
friends, family, even acquaintances. We make sure she gets good information,
and has someone to listen to her,” said Hill.
If she chooses to place the child for adoption, she can then select the
family in which to place her child.
After having made her choice she and the parents can decide how open the
adoption should be. Communication options may be with letters, pictures, phone
calls, or even annual or quarterly meetings.
“I have never had a person regret placing her child up for adoption, she has
felt guilt.” Said Hill, “But they can work through that and for support there is a group that meets on Wednesday 4:00-5:30 pm it is for the future birth mothers.”
The meetings are at LDS Family Service and at the same time and place there is a partner meeting for the future biological grandparents.
Adoption touches more than just the birth mothers and families future
siblings can see adoption from a similar perspective.
“My mom thought she would not be able to have children so she adopted my
older sister,” said freshman Abbey Avery. “I did not even find out she was adopted until I was 12 years old, but she has always been one of the family.
Unlike most recent adoptions Abbey’s sister was a closed adoption though it
was brought about by the same agency LDS Family services.
“She met her biological mother when she turned 21 and even was introduced to her two half-brothers,” Avery said. “When her biological mother introduced her to her as her daughter she was certain to clarify who she considered her real mother.
Jane McBride, a junior, was adopted as an infant and is grateful to have had
a closed adoption. “I would have had a harder time defining who I was with this other mother figure communicating with me.
“Open adoption is not for the child it is for the mother, she is not willing to completely give up her child.” said McBride.
Hill disagrees, “All the evidence we have found shows that children from open
adoption can feel even more loved. They are given a real understanding of that
love of both their birth mother and parents.
On November 4th at the Aztec Building will be hosting a Carnival sponsored by Families Supporting Adoption. The carnival itself will begin at 1 pm until 3
pm, prior to that a leadership meeting and light lunch beginning at 9:30 am.
-skjohnson@cc.usu.edu