‘Head over Heels’ falls flat on its face

“Head Over Heels” stars Monica Potter as Amanda Pierce, a not-so-lucky-in-love woman who wants to believe that men are basically good.

Her misguided optimism leads her down a tragic path of disappointment as we learn she has fallen victim to the bait-and-switch charms of a New York bachelor.

I completely understand her pain. This movie was awful – the kind of awful that makes watching Sally Struther’s “Save the Children” commercials seem outrageously funny by comparison. I couldn’t have felt more betrayed if I had caught the film’s producers in the parking lot trying to steal my hubcaps.

This kind of thoughtless filmmaking is nothing less than robbery.

The makers know they’re pushing what is the equivalent of a Tijuana knock-off, but somehow they manage to lure enough suckers to keep themselves in business. Sadly, I was one of them. I can’t believe I paid to see it.

“Head Over Heels” isn’t funny – nor is it a good love story. In fact, it fails in every way possible. It plays out like an inappropriate joke told at a polite dinner party.

It’s the kind where the teller, not realizing how embarrassing he has become, keeps repeating the punch line and guffawing at a silent, disapproving audience.

Viewers are forced to endure more poo-comedy than a cafeteria on chili day.

Freddie Prinze Jr. has a noisy and apparently smelly bout with the toilet while some girls hide in a nearby shower.

The movie’s creators must not have thought this enough as the models again find themselves trapped in the john – this time on a toilet in a men’s room stall that promptly erupts in a Vesuvius of human excrement.

It may have had potential, but after a decent start the story was butchered by repetitive episodes of junior high school slapstick that seemed out of place in this type of film.

Even fans of physical humor are sure to be disappointed. Prinze Jr.’s character walks a dog that is forever knocking Potter over and trying to hump her.

Great if you’re a fetishist, but not so funny when you’re trying to pick through the slapstick in hopes of finding a story.

Eventually the movie reveals what everyone had already divined from the trailer – that Prinze Jr.’s erratic behavior can be explained by the fact that he’s been harboring a noble secret behind his come-hither smile. his movie might possibly be entertaining to people who can’t seem to get enough of making flatulent noises with their armpits. During our screening there were two girls in the theater who laughed non-stop throughout the entire film – credits and all.

I suspect they were either high or just really obnoxious. If it was the latter, they were at the right movie. For everyone else, I suggest avoiding this film.