LETTER: Hurd camp out screwed students

Quinn Cottrell

To the editor:

Just so everyone knows, I am the world’s biggest Hurd fan.

The events they host are so well-thought out and successful. They really know how to bring out the best in you – just like coat hangers and abortion clinics. I mean, this level of success is what has all the critics raving of their choice of how to allocate student admission tickets to the USU-BYU game.

What is a better determinant of worth to receive a ticket than skipping classes, packing eight people in a two-man tent in 20-degree weather and essentially coming to understand Dante’s Seventh Ring of Hell?

I mean, by the same standard, every illegal Mexican working at Rancheritos is eligible for a wristband as well.

I couldn’t think of a better way to do it myself, except for maybe allocating tickets to every student who paid student fees for the games anyways. Now, some of the nay-sayers out there are upset at the Hurd saying that the event was severely mismanaged. But know this Hurd – I will always be your biggest ally. We go together like Hillary and Bill Clinton.

I enjoy watching you screw people over.

– Quinn Cottrell