Benefits of marriage
For students who are afraid of commitment, this might change minds: people who are married live longer, healthier, and happier lives, according to a report by Hope College.
Marriage, especially during college, may give the illusion of too much responsibility and commitment. However, some couples say the benefits outweigh the risks.
Single men and women who fear marriage should know that it has physical, emotional and financial benefits.
Marriage is not uncommon at college. Craig Petersen, director of USU’s Analysis Assessment and Accreditation, said that while information isn’t complete, at USU, about 11 percent of freshmen and sophomore students are married and 50 percent of graduating seniors are married.
The physical and emotional benefits that married classmates enjoy are nothing to snicker at. A report published by Hope College in 2006 listed several benefits. Physical benefits of marriage include less illness, stronger immune systems, less heart disease and cancer, and suffer fewer accidents. The emotional benefits range from less depression, higher quality and quantity of sex, possessing greater hope and the ability to handle stress better.
One Aggie Village couple whole-heartedly agreed with the above findings. Landon and Lizzy Smith said they have been happily married for more than two years. They were married while in college at the Salt Lake City Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) Temple.
Landon is a senior at USU, majoring in vocal performance as well as choral music education. Lizzy graduated in the fall of 2007 from USU in vocal performance.
“I feel I have more reason to take care of myself, I have more reason to live,” Landon said in relation to his marriage.
Landon’s feelings are consistent with the finding of personal value people find in marriage. A deep, meaningful relationship can expand a person’s view, increase their self-esteem and hope for the future, all of which are great attributes for a college student.
“I am more confident as a person being married, and I don’t feel I always have to validate myself as a person. I don’t have to prove myself because I already have to Lizzy,” Landon said.
Mitch and Jamie Miller were married in July of 2008 at St. Jerome’s Newman Chapel on campus. Mitch is a graduate from Montana State University in mechanical engineering. Jamie is a senior at USU majoring in vocal performance and music therapy.
Stress is a common factor in college, and can be devastating to one’s health and grades. But marriage can actually help people cope with stress, including students. Jamie is no stranger to stress; she is taking 20 credits this semester, and she said she would never have attempted it without the support of her husband.
“Mitch is my personal chef, cheerleader, counselor and outdoor adventurer. Basically, he helps me deal with stress in a positive way and encourages me to do my best each day. I am expecting very good grades this semester,” Jamie said.
A spouse can indeed be all the things Jamie mentioned, and more. A positive motivator seems to be a common role for both couples. Lizzy said she received her best grades while being married because her husband kept her focused and encouraged her to do her best.
Mitch Miller said he performs many roles as a spouse to help his wife while she is in school.
“I try to keep the house in order so Jamie has a less distracting place to work on schoolwork,” Mitch said.
Both the Millers and Smiths lived with roommates before their marriage. They all acknowledged their improved quality and focus in life after being married as opposed to living with roommates. The Smiths said they eat healthier, have a cleaner environment, have no uninvited guests and sleep better. The Millers both said there is better communication and compatibility with each other than with roommates.
“Dorms are fun, but it is harder to do what you came to do. Marriage is very conducive to going to college,” Lizzy said.
Increased finances are also conducive to college, another benefit of marriage. While marriage can initially require a large expenditure, a couple can pool their resources and provide for each other. Lizzy said she is providing for their home while Landon goes to school.
“I am less frivolous with money now. I used to shop all the time. But now, I manage my money with my husband,” Lizzy said.
Mitch noted the same change in less selfishness in how money is spent. Married couples that manage their money can invest in their future together.
To combat neglecting each other due to heavy school loads, the Miller’s said daily quality time together is essential for building this relationship.
The Millers said, “It’s important for us to put everything aside and spend quality time together. Whether it’s as short as going for a walk in the evening or as long as a day of skiing, it helps enormously with our relationship.”
The responsibility the couples feel towards their respective spouse can be demanding, but in no way unrewarding. A meaningful relationship is created in the process of living everyday life with each other. The meaningfulness of marriage is in itself a benefit, Lizzy said.
“It is my drive in life, my purpose for living,” Lizzy said.
-storee.powell@aggiemail.usu.edu