HITCHED – Marriage traditions in other cultures

While the state of Utah is not known for being a melting pot of races and ethnicities, one of the main priorities of Utah State University, according to President Noelle Cockett, is diversity. But in order to embrace diversity, one must first understand the minority cultures and races at the university.

And an important component of any culture is courtship and marriage patterns, something USU students Justin and Ashley Bresee had to take into account for their wedding.

“We ended up really just combining traditions from both cultures to make a wedding experience that was very unique,” Justin said.

With different cultural backgrounds — Justin from the United States and Ashley’s family from Mexico — they had to make many compromises to make sure both families’ customs were represented. 

“Sometimes it was difficult for either family to understand the traditions of the other families,” Justin said, “but in the end, it turned out wonderfully,” 

One Hispanic custom implemented into their wedding was the “money dance.” This involved reception attendees paying a couple of bucks to dance with the bride or groom. Additionally, all their food was Latino, while the music was a mix of both cultures, including line dances which Justin said was “fun to see people from the opposite culture learn.”

Conversely, American dating and marriage culture can be difficult for international students to understand, even without Utah’s additional complications. Heavily influenced by the practices of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Utah dating norms can stray wildly from norms across the country.

At USU, China is the most common country for international students. 

One of the biggest differences between the cultures is online dating and public affection. After only a short time at USU, Mormon culture will be noticeable. In China, dating and affection in public are much more common, which may be due to fewer people dating at USU overall or just cultural differences.

Another difference is the age at which people tend to date and get married.

Meredith Wang, a professor at USU, said high school kids are not usually allowed to date in China because parents and teachers tell them it will distract them from their studies. 

Wang said that once in college, Chinese people date more than Aggies do. However, they also said Utahns will, in general, get married much sooner and during school more often than Chinese people do.

In Chinese culture, careers and schooling often take precedence, ending with couples split up across the vast nation. The couples will date more seriously and get married more in the workplace than in college due to the uncertainty college can create for their futures.

How much parents get involved in their children’s dating is another important part of the culture.

“Parents are usually not involved in the dating part,” Wang said. “But if a couple decides to get married, parents will be very involved in the decision and the process.”

Although many Chinese parents will be very judgemental about their child’s fiancé, taking into account their home, family and degree. But in recent generations parents have become more lenient about who their children date and decide to marry. 

—william.bultez@aggiemail.usu.edu

@willistheginger