Best of the best: Academy Awards in review

Like every other year since 1929, the Oscars came and went in a flurry of ball gowns and bow ties Sunday night. Live commentary flooded Twitter and new meme material doubtlessly filled the hard drives of Huffington Post and BuzzFeed.

So, like every other media entity, we are jumping on the bandwagon of Academy Award commentary by recognizing the following outstanding/ unbelievable/ uncomfortable performances at this year’s Oscars.

Best accurate dig goes to host Neil Patrick Harris who, within the first minutes of the night, said the Academy Awards “honor Hollywood’s best and whitest, sorry, brightest.” Bingo.

Best red carpet photo goes to the happiest, squeeziest embrace between Jennifer Aniston and Emma Stone because it kind of looks like they’re trying to merge their individual selves into a single, super-humanly talented and beautiful actress queen, and I’m not mad about that.

Best overall musical performance goes to John Legend and Common for “Glory” from Academy-snubbed “Selma.” The two won the Oscar for Best Original Song right after the performance, which received a standing ovation. If you didn’t see the powerful, emotionally-driven performance, YouTube it immediately and experience the chills.

Best surprisingly brilliant musical performance goes to Lady Gaga with her tribute to “The Sound of Music.” Even Julie Andrews herself was blown away with Gaga’s class act, hugging her and saying, “Dear Lady Gaga, thank you for that wonderful tribute.” So tender.

Best inanimate object goes to the Lego Oscar statues that appeared after Tegan and Sara and The Lonely Island shook the stage and the Academy’s stuffy social norms with “Everything is Awesome.” Emma Stone got her hands on one and, with a wistful look in her eyes, held it up in the camera’s frame while she was pictured with the other nominees for best supporting actress.

Best Meryl-approved acceptance speech goes to Patricia Arquette, who roused an emphatic approval from Meryl Streep and other actors when she advocated equal pay in her acceptance speech for best supporting actress: “To every woman who gave birth to every taxpayer and citizen of this nation, we have fought for everybody else’s rights. It’s our time to have wage equality, once and for all. And equal rights for women in the United States of America.” Arquette later elaborated with a backstage comment that met controversy: “It’s time for all the women in America and all the men who love women and all the gay people and all the people of color that we’ve fought for, to fight for us now.” I choose to focus on the sentiment behind her original comment, and fist pump in agreement with Streep.

Best fangirl moment goes to Eddie Redmayne, who shook and all but squealed with glee when he beheld his tiny golden man upon winning best actor for his performance of Stephen Hawking in “The Theory of Everything.”

Most awkwardness in a single night goes to, you guessed it, John Travolta. First, he snuck up on Scarlett Johansson on the red carpet to kiss and side-hug her. I probably could have forgiven this, were it not for his second offense. It seemed he was trying to upstage his own performance last year, when he announced a musical performance by “Adele Dazeem.” It was Dazeem herself—Idina Menzel—who welcomed Travolta back on stage under the coy alias “Galom Gazingo.” Travolta then grabbed and caressed Menzel’s face and would not let go. The world shuddered collectively. I don’t even want to know what he has in store for next year.

—Noelle Johansen is a senior in Spanish and journalism. While watching the Oscars, she said she loved Adrien Brody and within three seconds he winked at the camera, so it must be fate. Send help to noellejohansen@gmail.com or on Twitter @broelle.