COLUMN: Why is America obsessed with criticism
So last night, while I was sitting up at 2 a.m. thinking about doing homework but actually looking at porn, I came across a picture that looked a great deal like a certain 41-year-old virgin who has been given the title of “porn czarina” in Utah. Look, I’m not saying it was her, all I’m saying is that it looked like her. Because we know she would never do something like that. The whole thing did get me thinking, though.
What’s the deal with America and its constant need to complain and criticize everything that has nothing to do with them? I mean honestly, this happens on so many scales. Sporting events, for example. I’m at the bar visiting with friends, enjoying the atmosphere and the next thing I know there’s some baseball-cap-wearing loudmouth standing next to me with a beer in his hand, yelling at the big screen, “Shoot it! Oh man! You call that a shot?” Hey assistant coach Killjoy sit down, shut up and drink another big dog because the little man in the television shooting the ball can’t hear you.
Here is another example of annoying criticism. Have you ever been at home enjoying a really good PBS or Discovery special and you hear a knock at your door? First you think it’s the pizza you just ordered, and as you open the door you think, “My, these pizza guys are really looking sharp,” but once the door is open you only see a pair of backpack-toting little boys and no pizza. And the first thing they ask is if I’d like to hear a message about some dead guy. And I’ve found that they even criticize if your choice of theology just so happens to be different from theirs.
People seem so intent on criticizing everything around them. From who ordered the pizza with anchovies, to virgins against porn, to anyone who likes to movie “Titanic,” to cynical obnoxious newspaper columnists who have appointed themselves as the grand pumba qualified to criticize everything around them and … umm … well I’m sure they have a reason for … maybe I spoke a little hastily there.
Yeah, that’s right, I’m guilty too, but you know what? I probably receive more criticism about my criticism than W. Bush receives on any given day of the week. OK, so perhaps I’m stretching it a little there, but I do receive a plethora of criticism from week to week from people who love to tell me how full of shi… foul matter I am. And you know what? I love it. Love it! Because it just proves to me what a good job I am doing.
Look, there are things that deserve some criticism in this world: Hitler’s treatment of the Jews, Julia Roberts winning an Academy Award, everything that W. Bush does, people who continually try to oppress minorities – women, homosexuals, different ethnic origins, etc – and a “porn czarina” who knows nothing about sex.
The main problem I see is that honest, true and relevant criticism is as hard to find as Hunter S. Thompson spending a nice, quiet, sober evening at home. Criticism has become a profession where nothing nice is allowed because members of society have the notion engrained into their minds that true criticism is bad criticism. And that is simply the worst, most misconstrued, thought demeaning, reality devoid drivel I’ve ever heard of in my self-important life.
You want to know a system of criticism I appreciate? The Theater department on campus has this past week shared some student-written plays with the campus and community with a roundtable of discussion and critique afterward with the actual artist responsible for the play.
This is a fabulous concept: discussing the work while the creator is right there with you. I didn’t stay for the roundtable afterward and you want to know why? I thought the work was brilliant and had no real criticism for them. But the concept of artist-present criticism is something that should become a professionally practiced concept.
And to all of you who have, throughout the year, criticized my views, theories and inability to care what you think, just remember that it’s the way I see it, and you know what? I’m right.
Rich Timothy is a senior majoring in technical writing. Comments may be e-mailed to rtimothy1@hotmail.com