Double Vision
Sometimes going to class for your twin backfires
Sick, lazy, ugly day – whatever the reason, sometimes you just don’t feel like going to class. So why not send your identical twin? That way you can make sure not to miss any in-class projects and quizzes, get the notes and appear to be there even when you are in bed.
Good plan, huh? You’d think so, and so did we. The scenario: we both had the same class at the same time.
To make sure students come to class, the teacher calls random names every day and asks the people questions; if you aren’t there, you lose major points. So, we figured we could take turns and each go half the time. It wouldn’t matter which of our names got called because the professor wouldn’t be able to tell the difference anyway.
Ideally, the plan was flawless, but we soon found out it didn’t take into account user error – “user error” meaning you sister being too lazy to hold up her end of the deal after you already got her points for her. Yes, Lexie decided not to go to class on the day my name was called.
Thanks again, sis.
Twins get pressured into more blind dates than the average person
As with any blind date, this isn’t always pretty. There is the common misconception that twins are inseparable and that we refuse to be parted. Ok, we’re not going to say this isn’t true – in fact, in dating situations, we do prefer to have each other around.
You know, safety in numbers. But sometimes that concept leads to awkward situations that at least one of us could have avoided.
In the event that one of us gets asked out, that guy will inevitably find a friend for the other twin. If nothing else, at least we get to broaden our social horizons by dating the occasional stranger who never intended to ask us out in the first place.
Disclaimer: This segment is in no way representative of last weekend’s rodeo/bowling/ice cream activity.
Surround sound is an unavoidable side effect of socializing with twins
We don’t practice it, but we’ve been known to speak whole sentences – whole paragraphs even – in unison. Turns out it’s unavoidable.
Comments such as “Woah, it’s like constant surround sound” and “Listen, they even have twin laughs” are not uncommon for us to hear multiple times a day. Due to the fact that we think the exact same things are funny at the exact same time, sometimes the situation gets a little out of hand.
I, Lindsay, recently had to issue a formal apology to a group of coworkers after some surround-sound laughter became a little out of control. Sometimes you just can’t help yourself when you have 18 different cheesy twin pictures taken for the newspaper and they only get progressively worse. The one you’ll notice above was number four, so please don’t try to imagine what number 18 looked like. Our first mistake: back-to-back pose, arms folded.
Twins have unauthorized pictures of them floating all over the place
No, not twin pictures like you’ve seen on all those late-night infomercials – or at least we hope not, because those people sure wouldn’t be getting their money’s worth. More like pictures of us in matching neon outfits and side ponytails holding hands at Disneyland … as 4-year-olds. We figure there must not be any twins in Asia because those foreign tourists were pretty fascinated with us.
Lexie and Lindsay are juniors majoring in print journalism. If you have an unauthorized picture of us at Disneyland, we’d like it back. You can contact us at
lindsaykite@cc.usu.edu.