False alarm code blue triggered PTSD in gun violence survivors

For someone who has been through trauma, even false alarms can be triggering.

A few weeks ago when Utah State University’s Code Blue system sent out a warning of an “armed aggressor” on campus, Sierra Wise was in the printmaking studio with other art students.

Her fight-or-flight instincts were to make sure everyone hid underneath the tables while their professor locked the door and some students covered the windows.

About five to 10 minutes later, an “all clear” message was sent out on the system, telling students, faculty and staff that the alert was an error.

Although it was a false alarm, those several minutes of uncertainty sparked symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder in Wise, the USU Student Association senator for the arts college and a firsthand witness of gun violence.

About four years ago, she was serving as a missionary in Guatemala for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints when she found herself in the wrong place at the wrong time.

She and her mission companion were talking to some women outside their family’s home in broad daylight when a Jeep with blacked out windows drove toward them with armed men inside.

“Then all of a sudden we heard like these loud noises behind us,” Wise said. “They had sawed-off shotguns and were shooting at the women who we were speaking to, but we were in the line of fire.”

They ran with the women into the house and hid under a bed as family members barricaded the door. One man was shot in the arm, but nobody else was injured.

Police were nearby and chased the shooters down the street before they could do more damage. The missionaries immediately ran out the door and got as far away from the area as possible.

Wise said the men who shot at them were likely seeking drug money the family owed them.

While they were not the intended target of the shooting and escaped physically unharmed, the ordeal left psychological scars.

It wasn’t until she returned home that Wise realized she had post-traumatic stress disorder — that this was more than just a “crazy mission story.” She found herself uncomfortable around firearms, strongly disliking loud noises, and dealing with the uncertainty that someone, anyone, could have a weapon on them that could be a threat to her safety.

Wise was diagnosed with PTSD by a psychiatrist, then met with a therapist to work through the symptoms.

One major part of this, Wise said, was acceptance — accepting that everyone experiences trauma to some degree in their life, but not everyone experiences post-traumatic stress, and for those who do, it is not their fault.

“That was hard for me to cope with,” Wise said.

She would ask herself, “Why do I have PTSD? What did I do wrong, either in this original situation or afterwards?”

With the help of a mental health professional though, she said she’s been able to work through it and realize that there is no right or wrong way to deal with trauma.

“It’s incredibly affirming to have someone coach you through that and talk you through that and to recognize … this isn’t my fault,” she said.

But on Feb. 20, the Code Blue alert brought back similar feelings.

“Hiding under a table with a crying classmate felt very reminiscent to hiding under a bed with a crying companion,” Wise said.

After finding out the alert was a mistake, she called her therapist right away to make an appointment.

“I anticipated that I was going to have PTSD symptoms, and I definitely did,” she said.

Symptoms she had previously worked through in therapy resurfaced, and she had nightmares for about a week after the false alarm. But therapy again gave her someone to talk through the trauma.

Wise emphasized her appreciation to how the university handled the aftermath, particularly the listening session hosted the next day when university administration and police gave a more detailed explanation and gave students and employees the chance to speak their concerns.

“The experience was definitely unfortunate, but it wasn’t tragic because it was a false alarm,” she said. “But my heart goes out to all the people who have been in situations like that that weren’t false alarms.”

She said she also recognizes that her experience is different than many other trauma survivors. Having witnessed gun violence and fearing for her life, while still traumatic, she considered herself “privileged” compared to victims of personal violence.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, PTSD usually comes after a “shocking, scary, or dangerous” experience, such as assault, abuse, car accidents, war, disasters, or the loss of a loved one. It can come at any time or any age, shortly after the experience or years later.

While a single event or experience can be traumatic, so can prolonged exposure to traumatic things — even witnessing them secondhand.

USU journalism Professor Matthew LaPlante talks openly with his classes about his PTSD. As a newspaper reporter, he has covered traumatic things like the Iraq War, gang warfare in El Salvador and tribal infanticide in Ethiopia. He has also interviewed and written about the families of fallen soldiers, which he said was just as traumatizing if not more.

Rather than one particular experience, LaPlante said his PTSD came from many of these experiences over time.

Even while writing about others’ post-traumatic stress — including war veterans and their families — he said he didn’t realize that he was also experiencing it.

“I was constantly being triggered, but I didn’t know that was what was happening,” he said of the time when he sought help about 10 years ago.

July has sometimes been hard for him, he said, as the sound of whistling and exploding fireworks would sometimes trigger him.

Recently, he said, an unexpected sneeze from his wife can even do it.

LaPlante was teaching a class when the “armed aggressor” Code Blue alert was sent out.

“For me, it was amazing how completely normal it felt,” he said. “It could have been triggering … you never know with those things.”

The National Institute of Mental Health lists criteria for a PTSD diagnosis, including multiple of these symptoms:

• Flashbacks
• Bad dreams
• Frightening thoughts
• Avoiding certain places, people, thoughts or objects related to a traumatic event
• Being easily startled
• Feeling tense
• Trouble remembering things about the traumatic event
• Feeling guilt or blame

Wise added that if someone tells a trusted family member or friend that they have PTSD, it would not usually be appropriate to follow up by asking what happened.

“If that person wants you to know what happened, they’ll tell you,” she said. Instead, she suggested that one could ask questions like “Do you want to talk about it?” or if there is anything that could either help or make it worse.

“You don’t always have to know the story behind why someone has a post-traumatic response,” she said.

Editor’s note: The author is currently one of LaPlante’s students and was in his class at the time of the Code Blue alerts.

spencerburt@aggiemail.usu.edu

@SpencerABurt