Guys discuss dating and sexual assault
A group of six male students gathered Thursday in the Taggart Student Center Sunburst Lounge to sit on a panel and answer questions relating to sexual assault. They spoke of the Red Zone, the period of time from the start of school to Thanksgiving in which rapes and other sexual crimes are highest on college campuses across the country.
“It’s kind of hard to talk about it,” said Jon Morrill, president of the Sigma Nu fraternity. “I didn’t want to do it originally, then I did want to do it.”
Most members of the six-man panel seemed to agree.
Amir Malek, president of the Greek Counsel, said he was, “pretty uncomfortable with [being on the panel],” and felt that it wasn’t very relevant to him.
Pleased that they were able to get past their initial hesitation out on the floor, Scott Bates, professor of psychology and facilitator of Thursday’s forum, began by asking the panel how they felt about the burden of dating and initiating sexual behavior, which could even include kissing, that rests on men in our society.
“I really do get really nervous about asking girls on dates,” said Jared Blonquist, president of the Sigma Chi fraternity.
Jamal Jaber, president of Psi Sigma Phi fraternity, said he felt dating was “bad financial management.”
“I’ve never asked anybody out on a date in my life,” Jaber said. “I look at dating as a messed up theory these days. I would rather just hang out with the person.”
When asked about what signs helped men know that a woman was interested in them and in pursuing a more physical relationship, most of the panel guys seemed stumped.
“I guess you could say like you never really know,” Morrill said. “I mean, if you don’t take a shot, you really don’t know.”
“There needs to be clear-cut, unmistakable communication [in any relationship],” Jaber said.
Mike Ahmad, a member of the USU basketball team majoring in sports management, said, “It’s communication. You just have got to talk to each other.”
All of these men, picked on recommendation by Student Services, are in leadership positions across campus. When asked what their respective organizations were doing during the Red Zone, most replied they were bringing in groups and speakers to address the issues of date rape, sexual assault and sexually transmitted diseases, as well as trying to inform the public about the issues.
Janet Osborne, director of the Women’s Center for Lifelong Learning and the facilitator of SAAVI (Sexual Assault and Anti-Violence Information), though displeased with the overall attendance of about 25 people, was excited that these issues were being discussed by men.
“It’s really hard for guys to talk about these issues,” she said.
Osborne said activities such as these have been done before, and different activities are planned for the rest of the Red Zone this year.
“We’re thinking incoming freshmen, women primarily, are at risk due to a lot of factors.” Osborne said. “Generally, they’re put in environments where there are a lot of people and a lot of different kinds of people.”
Other factors included drinking, a desire to fit in, and simply not knowing the situations in which they’re placed. It was observed that women need to be careful, especially in new or uncomfortable situations.
“Whether everyone’s behavior now will be changed because of this panel, I doubt it,” Osborne said. “But the more that you can engage in this kind of dialogue, the healthier it is.”
Men and women looking for more information about the Red Zone and sexual assault can contact the Women’s Center and SAAVI.
-mattgo@cc.usu.edu