LETTER: Asses? Wouldn’t spleens be better?

Dear Editor,

Attention everyone with an ass: Somebody doesn’t want you sitting on the Quad. Apparently, our bums are causing big problems on the Quad. I’m sure the poetic and enlightened student who wrote “Keep your ass off the grass” all around the Quad was actually talking about keeping our feet off the grass. It makes much more sense. However, his/her lack of anatomical knowledge is not the point. Scribbled, sidewalk chalk, rhyming profanities are not going to keep people from walking on the Quad and leaving “cow trails.” Anyone seen Old Main Hill lately? The Quad should be the least of our worries. But if you must be a poet, at least use some adjectives (describing words) and be original. For instance, try this: “Keep your (insert descriptive profanity here) spleen off the green” – that should keep us off the Quad.

Scott Anderson