LETTER: Police Blotter used to be good

Editor,

I am writing to announce the ending of my Statesman readership. This is due to the growing liberal tendencies of columnists, focus of editorials on anti-Mormon protesting or gay rights, and finally, the straw that broke the camels back: The metamorphosis of the Police Blotter from a listing of really intense violent crimes like water ballooning and mooning to a classified ads column for stolen bikes, a glorified lost and found.

Daily, as I pick up my Statesman, sip my cocoa I read reports such as: Police received a report of stolen training wheels from a Huffy 10 speed, bright pink, near the TSC. Streamers and a Barbie horn were also missing, any info can be given to the special bicycle crimes division of Campus Police. This is followed by a report reading: missing orange Velcro wallet, no money inside, “so just give it back!” they say. Gone are the days of drive by dorm paintballing, local roadkill updates, and old ladies next to campus reporting mysterious men lurking late at night under the windows of their girlfriend’s dorm. I challenge the editor, please, please bring back the real crimes. How else will I find the motivation I need to change the world, bring about peace, and end hunger.

This is an institution of higher learning where I find a cause and purpose in my life because of religion and morals, and my family have repressed me. Finally, um, I had my bike stolen … yeah, it’s got a banana seat, a cute bell, and beads on the spokes. Please e-mail me. Thanks.

Chris Tarbet