No, I don’t watch Game of Thrones

Just once I’d like to have a summer with some new trends.

Look, you crazy Game of Thrones diehards, the show’s been on the air since 2011 — you really think I’m suddenly going to jump on that bandwagon this week? As thrilled as I am to ride the bus to work every morning this summer listening to middle school kids discuss names of characters that probably won’t survive to the mid-season finale, I’m a little annoyed by the idea that I somehow don’t know what I’m missing. Maybe I just think it’s dumb, ever consider that?

Never have I met a fan of the show who, upon learning I had no interest in partaking of what is apparently the pinnacle of all 21st century entertainment, didn’t immediately start listing off the superior qualities of the show’s first season, the books, George R. R. Martin, Peter Dinklage, HBO in general and the fact that it gets a lot less rapey around season 3 or 4.

Game of Thrones fans and sushi lovers should get together with the crossfit folks and duel to the death over which is the most underappreciated. Have you ever considered that maybe there are some of us out there that don’t like raw fish, or graphic disfiguration, or popping joints out of our sockets during a gym session? You do you — but leave the rest of us alone.

And it’s not like Game of Thrones is the only topic “back” in the news despite the fact it never really left. Let’s all lose our freaking minds over a new Beyonce album, am I right? What a daring artistic move to release an album to promote your current tour, some real groundbreaking stuff there. Oh, but it’s available for free, which is a big deal because until now only tiny inconsequential bands like U2 and Radiohead pulled stunts like that.

Let me stop you right there before I get bricks through my living room window — don’t go thinking I hate Beyonce. I jam to Partition just like the rest of you. I’m just against anyone in the public eye who gives themselves a nickname or ruins a Super Bowl, and Beyonce’s managed to do both of those things in, like, four years.

Really, I’m waiting for the rest of the world to get as tired of the same old stuff in the news as I am. Miley Cyrus is back doing whatever it is she does. Deflategate is back and Tom Brady may or may not miss four games this fall. That’s a bad example actually, because I hope Deflategate goes all the way to the Supreme Court and never ever dies because angry Bill Simmons podcasts get me through the long work days.

But would it be the worst thing in the world to have some new stuff to talk about? Are we really content with this endless cycle we’re in, where we talk about the same four or five topics endlessly until school resumes in August?

Maybe that’s too much to ask. Part of me wants to throw my hands up and just buy into all of it. But then I’d have to watch Game of Thrones, and that’s just not something I’m going to do.

— Logan Jones is a junior majoring in journalism. Listening to “Partition” in the car is not ideal, but he’s not allowed to mess with the radio. Contact him at logantjones@aggiemail.usu.edu or on Twitter @Logantj