Pre-emptive Critics: 3:10 to Yuma

So Batman and Russell Crowe walk into a cowboy bar…

No, that’s not a joke – although the possibilities are endless. I think it’s the premise to this movie.

Apparently, Batman – aka Christian Bale – has had enough of the Joker, the Riddler and such, and now wants to go all dark knight on the Old West.

But that’s not all. Instead of doing what he’s best at, which would be fightin’ ’round the world, I guess Russell Crowe grew out of his beat-downs-with-a-telephone phase and right into his six-shooter-and-a-horse, if-Toby-Keith-were-an-Aussie phase.

And to boot, has anyone ever been to Yuma? Yeah, it’s just a bunch of old people. So maybe that’s what really happens in this movie. At 3:10, Batman and his trusty sidekick, Maximus, have a bloody gun battle with some geriatrics at the Yuma Golden Corral – the OK Corral was already booked.

That should make me squeamish, but I find myself strangely excited.

I pre-emptively love this movie.