REVIEW: Five bands that never should have broken up

ALEXANDER VAN OENE

Have you ever wondered what it would be like if bands never broke up? What would happen if, like day jobs, band members stuck it out because they needed the income, even if they hated it?

What if bands were like bad marriages— keeping together for the sake of the kids, or in this case, songs? What if famous musicians never died?

Well, I posed this question to myself, and so this week I mourn fallen bands by assembling the greatest list — the five bands that should have never broken up.

 

5. The Continentals: The Continentals are the band that was almost famous. The fullness of their sound, the tightness of their performances and the fantastic chemistry of their songs made The Continentals one of my favorite bands. With their release, “Rhino,” they proved that a layered sound could be full, yet not cluttered.

After going on several tours, The Continentals were almost at stardom, but several band members went on LDS missions and the other band members wanted to do new projects. Hopefully in a couple of years, they will come back and rock the music world. Until then, I will have to remorsefully enjoy their wonderful CD.

 

4. Aerosmith: Aerosmith is one of those bands that was really cool back in the ‘80s and ‘90s. Wayne’s World 2 is pretty much the best testament to their greatness. With several great releases like “Walk This Way,” “Dream On” and “I Don’t Want to Miss A Thing,” they are breaking the bank with just the royalties on the songs.

I don’t have beef with them playing and making music, but I do have beef with Steven Tyler constantly breaking the band up and then getting it back together.

Seriously, if you don’t want to be a part of the band, then use your big mouth to record a single album. Biebs does it every single day. Literally hundreds of singers release records they probably don’t even help write.

So Tyler, either stay with the band, go on tour and make money off of the suckers that still love the couple of songs you guys wrote back in the day or release something new with your band Aerosmith, or go do something else. I’m tired of hearing about you.

 

3. The Postal Service: The Postal Service is the best side project that everyone loves but doesn’t love you back. Heard of “Such Great Heights” or “The District Sleeps Alone Tonight”? Yeah, that was The Postal Service. They found the perfect blend of electronic and pop with catchy beats and vocal lines; it is a crime they aren’t creating music anymore.

“Give Up” is one of the best releases of the 2000s, not only because it pioneered a new sound and type of music, but it effectively helped Ben Gibbard’s other band Death Cab for Cutie.

When “Codes and Keys” was supposed to drop like a keyboard-driven beatfest in the same vein as The Postal Service, I was so pumped. When it released like a fart in the wind, making little waves critically or musically, I cried “Foul.” I just want Gibbard to go back and find the perfect song writing that he found with The Postal Service. Don’t give up.

 

2. The White Stripes: The White Stripes found the hole in modern music and filled it. Jack White isn’t a god of rock, but he is in the ranks of messiah. Even with simple beats and songs, The White Stripes not only brought back classic blues rock, but they moved the hearts of millions.

In a fake, plastic-like world, they brought emotion back. “Seven Nation Army,” “Icky Thump” and countless others have fueled the teenage angst of several — nay — millions of young adults.

Sure, it was a good time to end it. Sure, the Raconteurs have that one good song. But is one song really worth it? I think if they stayed together and released another album of soft, emotion-filled blues, then the world would be a better place. Jack White redeemed modern rock, but he shouldn’t stop. He should make the world and himself more real, every day.

1. *NSYNC: I think I fooled all of you. You were probably expecting Led Zepplin, Pink Floyd or Simon and Garfunkel. But no, you get *NSYNC, and this is why. *NSYNC almost controlled pop music back in the boy band days of Boyz II Men, Backstreet Boys and New Kids on the Block, but yet again too much estrogen broke up another band.

Seriously, if *NSYNC stayed together despite differences, the pop music world would be different today. Justin Timberlake probably wouldn’t have gone on to do “Sexy Back,” or it would have been toned down.

 

alexander.h.van_oene@aggiemail.usu.edu