Taking control of your emotions
Students have to deal with many issues that create a world of emotions.
From happiness or sadness to excitement or fear, it’s not surprising that students end up on an emotional roller coaster.
But by understanding emotions and learning how to learning how to control them, students can better deal with the ups and downs of college life.
LuAnn Helms, a licensed psychologist at the USU Counseling Center, helps students better understand their emotions and learn how to manage them.
“I don’t think that controlling them is a good idea, but being able to manage them is.”
“Some students come in because they have problems coping with anger, they feel guilt and shame, experience sadness or lose a loved one,” Helms said.
Tom Atwood, a sophomore majoring in Spanish, said, “We deal with our emotions every day.” When asked why students are emotional, he said, “I think school is one thing. [Students] feel weighed down with all the things they’re involved with like homework, family, and relationships.”
Alisha Barnes, a senior majoring in psychology, said she has had difficulty in the past handling emotional strain and its effect on her studies.
“Last year, I had this very negative mindset of not only myself, but of my own world,” she said. It brought my grades down and it brought my view of how I was doing in school down. I thought I could just make it up and just be this superstar and get everything done and then it didn’t happen.”
Negative attitudes and sadness are emotions that affect students in one way or another. For instance, a person who feels incapable of succeeding isn’t likely to put forth much effort. This person, therefore, is on the road to failure. Psychologists call this the self-fulfilling prophecy.
Atwood said she has felt similar emotions.
“I have felt sad and I think a lot of people feel sadness every once in a while,” Atwood said. “But it’s the times when I’m so wrapped up in that one moment – like I have tunnel vision-that I need to take a step back and assess all the other things that are happening.”
By avoiding distressing situations, a person can have a clearer understanding of the root emotions.
“I think you can jump out of it,” Atwood said. “Don’t dwell on it. You can figure out what’s making you sad and do what it takes to fix it.”
According to Helms, emotional success involves the healthy management of emotions.
“One of the main ways is to manage your stress,” Helms said. “It’s easier to get angry or frustrated or to act in ways we wish we didn’t if we’re not taking good care of ourselves.” She said some ways to manage stress are getting enough sleep, eating well, and having social networks.
Atwood agreed, noting that thinking about others helps him manage his undesirable emotions.
“If I’m not happy or I’m frustrated or depressed, then I’m thinking way too much about myself and I need to think more about others,” he said. “That definitely helps. I kind of put what’s bothering me on the side and be consumed about what’s going on in other people’s lives, which is hard to do because we like to worry about ourselves.”
If students focus on serving others, they may experience some relief from negative emotions.
Atwood recommended a few ways to serve at USU, like helping out in LDS Institute organizations, ASUSU clubs, the Service Center and Spanish Ambassadors.
Barnes makes the choice to be optimistic and said that is what works for her.
“I have decided to not think negatively of myself, to not have a pessimistic view of school and to not have a negative outlook on my own life,” she said. “So now I force myself to be positive and to think optimistically about things around me. Instead of saying, ‘Oh my gosh, I did this wrong,’ I say, ‘OK, I learned and I’m going to go on. I can do this and I can try better next time.’ When I come across a problem, I don’t react to it; I act upon it.”
-apwinegar@cc.usu.edu